MommyBizCentral

Shiloh · Thu May 24, 2007 1:47 pm Would you feel guilty?

I'm feeling a little guilty about hiring someone to help me with my housework. A little background on me, I have MS and Fibromyalgia and I have a difficult time with the major housework. Things like vacuuming, dusting, cleaning floors, etc wear me out and my pain flares up.

So I'm having an Amish girl come help me every other Friday and I feel like I need to clean before she comes tomorrow. The Amish keep their homes immaculate, and A's family is friends of DS's GF and I don't want to make a bad impression. I keep the place picked up, but it's dusty and stuff. Would you feel guilty and clean before a housekeeper's first visit?

Tamara · Thu May 24, 2007 2:12 pm

Im not sure What excactly are you having her do? Just the things that you cant? Then some cleaning would be necessary IMO. If there is no set thing to do then it wouldnt. once again this is just my opinion.

kjdama · Thu May 24, 2007 4:31 pm

I agree with Tamara- if she is only going to be doing the things that you are unable to do, then do your normal cleaning. Does she know what is expected of her yet?

Shiloh · Thu May 24, 2007 5:08 pm

I planned on having her dust, vaccuum and wash the floors, maybe clean the tub and shower. I can do the rest and I always have the kitchen cleand and the rest of the house picked up. I spoke with A and her mom and ok'd what I needed help with. I was feeling bad because I know this place is dusty, dog hair is on the floor, etc. and I'm embarrassed to admit that I can't keep up with it. I'm kind of a neat freak, where everything has it's place and I can't stand an unmade bed.

kjdama · Thu May 24, 2007 6:29 pm

Hey, admitting you can't keep up with everything is a-ok!!! I'm glad that you will have some help. Personally, I can't stand other people touching my stuff, and they never put things where I want them to be, so I have to do it all by myself. Needless to say, I have not kept up with everything either, and my bedroom is nearly up to the ceiling with clothes that either need to be put away or washed. :oops:

earthgifts · Thu May 24, 2007 11:10 pm

My husband and I were talking about hiring a cleaning service. I thought the same thing you did, Kim....that I'd have to clean first before they came in! :oops:

ashley · Guest

Personally I think if you can pick up a little thats cool.For me I wouldnt feel comfortable with someone else cleaning my home.Not that I dont trust them its just I am used to doing it and I actually enjoy cleaning LOL.My mom has a cleaning lady that only comes once a month.

ilovecharms · Guest

My thoughts are...don't give it another thought! You deserve the help and even if you didn't, why not? I say go for it and enjoy your nice clean home.

If I weren't guilty about not being such a great homemaker, I'd do it too!

Jessily · Guest

I'd say do the cleaning you normally do. Don't feel guilty, lol. I am so glad you will have someone to help... I've been trying to get diagnosis now for a year. We thought MS & Fibro aswell, but the brain MRI revealed no leasions. Something similar anyway.

I envy you actually, lol. I know it can be tough admitting you can' have the house clean as you want. No one comes past my doorway... I'd die if they saw it in here. Any cleaning I need to badger hubby into and he already works 2 full time jobs as I can't work.

What's happened is now it is very difficult to have a good relationship as he has become more of a caregiver and it's hard for me to see him as both. When you get to the point where he needs to help me change, I mean, lol.

Anyway, don't be embarased. I mean, this will be what she is going to do, she knows you need help with it, so no reason to be guilty... I know the mess and fact I can't do anything about it has caused so much stress it isn't funny! So, I'd say, breathe, get over this first day gitters, and soon your house will be fresh and clean and I think for anyone that will soon take a load of stress off. :P

That's just me though. I'd love to have someone help me around the house, but I'd probably have a panic attack letting them see.

*hugs*

(ps. I also HATE people touching my stuff, but by now it has outweighed that... when you pass out trying to clean or are in so much pain.... after about 20 times, you kinda give in to that feeling. And hey, it frees up a bit of energy you'd have drained cleaning, to do something more "productive")

Wow I talk way too much :P

Shiloh · Guest

Thank you ladies for you helpful input. It went well and I did clean some before A came over (didn't want the place too dirly, lol). It was a huge help, as she was able to do the heavy stuff I can never get to.

mommys3angels · Guest

Hi Kimb,
First let me say, I know exactly how you feel, I have MS also. I often thought about having someone come in and help, but it never progressed any farther than that. How long ago were you diagnosed? I have found that if I do one room at a time, and not all in one day, I get things done. Sometimes it might take me a few days to get the house clean, and then good grief, it's dirty again!
I would probably have done the same thing you did! It sounds like you found yourself a great helper!
god Bless
tracy :wink:

Shiloh · Guest

Tracy, I was diagnosed in 97, although I've had symptoms a few years before diagnose. Before Annie started I was like that, by the time I got the whole house clean, it was already dirty again, especially dust and dog hair :(

mommys3angels · Guest

Kimb,
Same thing with me, I was diagnosed in 98 after the birth of my 2nd child but started experiencing symptoms back in 94 after my first child was born.
I was hoping someone would invent something to help with cat hair.....our kitty is shedding like crazy!
yikes
tracy :wink: